


Killing Time

by BibliophileLove



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-15
Updated: 2015-06-15
Packaged: 2018-04-04 13:02:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4138557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BibliophileLove/pseuds/BibliophileLove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just my take on how the Tallest met, before they were the Tallest. Nothing fancy, just a one-shot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Killing Time

He annoyed me.

I couldn't decide whether I wanted to smack that itchy smirk off of his face, or just outright choke him and get it over with. He stood there, tall (though not taller than me) and arrogant. His antennae lay smooth and without twitching, as though he had not a care in the world. As though this test meant nothing to him. But I knew better. He was just like the rest of us, and it meant _everything._

We stood before the Tallest, the five of us. All Irken elite, the tallest of the tall (besides the Tallest themselves of course). We were candidates, the next set of Tallest, the future of our entire race, would be chosen out of our number. Our training had gone on for months, seven others had already been eliminated. They stood glaring at us from their platform, each thinking of new ways to torture us, I was sure. Last week we had all been forced to eat doughnuts until someone puked. The first to puke was eliminated. How our ability to eat massive amounts of doughnuts would affect our ability to rule the Irken race, I wasn't sure. But I wasn't going to question it.

I spared a glance at him again, my irritation increasing when I saw him stifle a yawn. How dare he act so… so… unconcerned! It irritated me that he did not seem to care about how he presented himself in front of our mighty leaders. And it also irritated me that it irritated me. Why should I care? He was of no importance to me. If he wanted to screw up his chance at being Tallest, then that should be of no concern of mine. I stood even straighter, my head held high and my back straight. _I_ would not make a fool of myself.

"Soda!" One of the Tallest suddenly screeched. We all jumped. A smaller Irken came running through, a cup with a cool bendy straw held out on a tray. He bowed and offered it to said Tallest, who took it without even a glance at the little guy. Serves him right, for being so small. He was not worthy of the Tallest attention.

The Tallest put his lips to the straw and sipped the soda, all the while studying us. His partner spoke then, his jointed tongue darting like a snake between his teeth;

"We have decided how we will test you this week stinklings. It has recently come to our attention that your trials have not been… difficult enough. No one was eliminated last week, so this week we will definitely eliminate one of your number!" He said, smiling gleefully. We all stood straight, trying not to fidget. I was worried, as if their 'tests' hadn't been hard enough. Now they were trying to make them worse?

"So we will be sending all of you to the planet BORING DEATH!" He said with relish. His partner stopped sipping soda long enough to add; "I thought that planet was called 'Death By Boredom'?" He asked. His companion responded, agitated; "Oh whatever then, we will be sending all of you to the planet DEATH BY BOREDOM!" He said, with even more emphasis. "You will all stay there for three MISERABLE days!" He sneered, his hands rubbing together as though he was washing them. I tried not to let my relief show. Three days really couldn't be _that_ bad…

 

* * *

 

 

I was laying on a rock, my eyes rolling into the back of my head and my jointed tongue hanging lifelessly out of the side of my mouth. I thought for sure I must be dying.

There was nothing here. Just a bunch of sand… and rocks… and nine suns. Yes, you heard me. Nine. I guess I don't have to say that it was really freaking hot.

The others had wandered off when we got here, I hadn't seen or heard from them. Not that I wanted to. Especially that _one_. The one that bothered me. Yeah, didn't want to see him. My soldier outfit itched, the suns made my skin dry. I don't know how long I laid there, letting my brain bake in the heat. It _had_ to have been at least a day by now.

A shadow suddenly loomed over my face, I squinted up at it. His purple eyes stared pleasantly down at me. I glared.

"What do you want?" I spat out. My voice was scratchy, my tongue didn't seem to agree with the heat any more than the rest of me did.

"Nothing. Just wondering why you were laying on this rock." He said. He didn't seem affected by my obvious hostility at all. How annoying.

"I am laying here, because there is NOTHING ELSE TO DO." I said, the words working their way out of my mouth. Funny how he didn't seem affected by the heat. I grew more annoyed.

"You seem to be kind of grumpy. Actually, you always seem to be kind of grumpy. Want a juice box?" And I watched his long green fingers, as if in slow motion, reach into his pocket and pull out that juice box. It had to have been the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, that juice box. I snatched it from him, my sluggishness forgotten. I wrapped my crackly tongue around that tiny little straw and drank the sweetest juice I had ever drank in my life. I sucked that straw until it was dry, the box making little noises of protest, trying to tell me that it had nothing left to give.

"There, is that better? Maybe you won't be so grumpy now." He said, smiling down at me, his purple eyes showing me nothing but sincere pleasantness. I glared at him. I was… indeed less grumpy. But I wasn't about to tell him that.

"Why are you here?" I asked him. My voice sounded less aggressive, I noted. I should work on that.

"I'm killing time." He said simply. I stared at him, my mouth hanging open. It was such a simple concept, this "killing time". I had to admit, it made sense. We were all stuck on the planet Death By Boredom, so, he was killing time. I couldn't decide whether he was a genius… or just plain stupid.

"What is your name?" I asked him.

"Purple. What is your name?" He asked, as though pleased that I cared. I did NOT care. I was just… curious.

"Red." I said, still staring up at him from my lounging position from piece of burning coal that I was laying on. He smiled at me, actually SMILED at me, and said;

"Well Red, I'm going to go find other stuff to do now." And then he just walked away. I sat up, watching him go, my head cocked to one side and my mouth hanging open slightly. I was suddenly agitated all over again.

"I can't TAKE it anymore! I can't go on! It's too much! The BOREDOM is KILLING me!" One of my fellow elite was screaming at the top of his lungs, his sharp green fingers digging into his own eyes. We were all sitting around a fire that Purple had built. _How_ he had built it, I had no idea. "I can't become Tallest! I am not WORTHY of such an honor! I can't go on like this! I miss my video games! I miss my late night snacks!" He continued to rant and scream, I continued to stare at him, my eyes narrowed. His voice was so screechy. I glanced over at Purple. He just sat there, on a rock with his elbow propped up on his knee, his chin in his hand. He stared at our screaming companion with an empty sort of agreeableness in his eyes. I suddenly wondered what was going on in his head.

"I can't stand this place for another MINUTE! Please let me off! Let me go home!" Our fellow Irken continued to screech. I scowled, trying to tune him out. We still had a whole day of this planet left and I did not want to listen to his caterwauling the entire time. I idly reminded myself that that was one more opponent down.

"Do you think the Tallest are happy being the Tallest?" Purple asked, apparently to no one in particular. No one answered, especially not me. I was sure they were watching, and I didn't want to risk saying anything that might offend them. But his question did make me wonder. Are they happy? Was it all it was cracked up to be, being Tallest?

Hours later we were all laying around the ashes of our dead and forgotten fire. I laid with my forearm over my eyes, to block out the suns that I had grown to hate so much. If I went through the rest of my life and didn't see a single sun I would not complain. I was just starting to wonder when we would be retrieved from this miserable rock when I heard the purr of the ships engines. I pulled myself to my feet and turned towards the sound. I had never been so happy to see one of those ships.

We were gathered separately since we had all wandered off in different directions. Purple was already in the ship when I entered. He smiled and waved at me. I ignored him to the best of my ability. The next and last to be picked up was the one who had been screaming, begging to be brought home. They took him to the back room as we flew out of the planets atmosphere. We didn't see him again. Only three opponents to go.

We were brought back to the Tallest's ship and sent to our individual rooms to clean ourselves before seeing the Tallest. I scrubbed myself meticulously with my cleansing chalk, making myself presentable for our almighty leaders. When I was finished I left my room and ran right into Purple as he was walking by my door, on his way to the Tallest. I had no choice but to accompany him.

"Hi there. We're almost there aren't we? Only four of us left." He said cheerfully as we walked. I couldn't believe he had made it this far.

"Yeah. Almost." I replied. We walked in silence after that to the Tallest's room. We were the first ones there, so we waited for the other two to show up.

After another ten minutes or so, we were all standing before our leaders, our backs straight and our heads held high. It was allowed, since the Tallests were on a platform above us, so there was no risk of our appearing to be taller than they were.

"We have decided on your last test." One of them said, puffing himself up importantly. We all stilled. There were four of us left. Why only one test?

"You will be put into teams of two, and compete against the other team. We have decided who will pair with who judged by your actions and experiences during your previous tests."

_Oh no... no... no... not him. Please don't pair me with him._

"Soldier Red, you will be paired with Soldier Purple. Soldier Splorg, you will be paired with Soldier Kreet."

 _Of course. I'm doomed._ I nearly hung my head in misery.

"You will all report back here first thing in the morning. Get some food and rest in the meantime, you will need your strength tomorrow _worms_. You are dismissed."

I sighed to myself, already accepting defeat. It was inevitable. Splorg and Kreet weren't amazing soldiers. I mean, I could best them easily. But together I might have trouble with them. And _he_ wasn't going to be any help at all. Splorg and Kreet automatically walked close together, whispering, already forming their alliance. Purple just walked up to me smiling. Like an idiot.

He annoyed me.

I sighed again, and resigned myself to my fate. I walked away, heading towards the foot court. He followed. We walked in silence. It agitated me how he slouched, his soldier march was nothing compared to mine. I walked with pride, pride for our might Irken race. He just... walked.

We entered the crowded food court and got in line for our food. There was a large selection, mostly junk. Amazing, delicious junk. No Irken could resist some good junk food. After filling our trays we walked over to a table. Other Irkens scurried to move out of our way, not making eye contact. Our uniforms were labeled, our status and next in line to becoming Tallest was there, for the entire race to see. We were above all, except the Tallest themselves.

I sat down at an empty table, knowing he would sit down next to me. He did. He munched on curly fries, a lot of curly fries, while I slurped my soda. The silence eventually became comfortable, instead of awkward. The longer it went on, the better I felt. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. I could work with this. I could do this. I was _meant_ to be Tallest. It was my destiny. I was not going to give up so easily. Splorg and Kreet had no idea who they were up against.

I felt better when I rose to toss my tray. He rose with me, as though he had just finished as well. We walked together out of the food court. I marched. He just walked, hands in his pockets. Another Irken came up to us while we walked towards our rooms, one of the Tallests personal servants. I raised my eyebrow as he stood in front of us, how dare he interrupt my march?

"The Tallests have commanded that both teams with share rooms with their teammates. You will bunk together tonight. Please follow me, I will show you to your new quarters." He walked away, down the hall. I stood, speechless. Why? Why did I have to stay in the same room as him? I turned to look at him, he just smiled and shrugged, then started off behind the smaller Irken. _Immensely_ irritated, I followed as well.

Our new room was large and grand. There was a living area with a large TV, a couch, tables and soft, cushy carpet. I approved. But there was only one bedroom. We had to share a bedroom. I felt my eye twitching as we walked into _our_ new room. At least there were two beds.

"Please report to the Tallest at breakfast hour. Good evening." The small servant bowed and left, leaving us alone. We stood in the doorway, looking at the two beds.

"Well this is cozy." He said, looking at me. I just stood there, silently fuming. He went to one of the beds and sat down, bouncing a little and testing it. When he started bouncing, his antennae springing with the movement, I started to calm down. I sighed.

"Is it comfortable?" I asked, trying not to be too angry with him. This wasn't his fault. Being the amazing soldier that I was, I understood that this wasn't his choice. I smiled to myself. My brain was amazing, of course I could forgive him. It wasn't his fault in the first place. I would make an excellent Tallest, when I won this.

"Yes, its great." He smiled up at me. "I'm glad I was paired with you. Now I know I will be Tallest. I was starting to worry." He grinned up at me. I stared at him, confused.

"What do you mean? How do you know?" I asked, taking a few steps closer to him.

"Well, there are two Tallests now. It makes more sense that they would pick two, not one, to succeed them. I've known all along that you would win. Now, I will win along with you." He said, as though all of this was obvious. I gaped at him.

"There is no guarantee that I will win." I said, after a beat. "Whoever is best suited and passes all the tests will win." I said, crossing my arms.

"Yes. And that is you." He grinned up at me, leaning back on the bed and crossing his long legs. His antennae lay back lazily. I began to retort, but stopped. I really didn't know what to say. I just stared at him, disbelieving. He couldn't possibly know that. I turned away, frustrated again, and laid on my own bed.

"I think you will make an amazing Tallest, Red. I will support you, one hundred percent." He said, from his side of the room. I turned and looked at him, he was facing the ceiling, his eyes closed. I studied his profile. He had surprised me. I couldn't decided whether he was an idiot... or a genius. Maybe he did know something I didn't.

I reached up and flicked the light off, letting the darkness settle over us like a blanket. I felt more comfortable then, when he couldn't see me. Less self conscious. Not that I would ever admit to it.

"Good night Purple." I said quietly.

"Goodnight Red." He replied, a smile in his voice.

I woke before he did, and I stood over his sleeping form. He was still, his gentle breathing was quiet and barely noticeable. His mouth was slightly open, I could see his tongue. I studied him, _really_ looked at him. His green skin was little lighter than mine, barely noticeable. His features were a little more delicate. I poked him in the shoulder once. He didn't budge. I poked him again. Nothing.

I narrowed my eyes and continued to watch him sleep. Something stirred, deep in my chest. I reached my finger out again and ran the tip down his face, softly. His skin was smooth and warm. Leaning down a little closer, I breathed in his scent. He smelled good, like cleansing chalk, fresh garden air, and curly fries. I couldn't help but smile.

And then, as I was smiling like an idiot, he chose that moment to open his eyes. My face was only a few inches away from his. I jumped like I had been electrocuted, my smile vanishing.

"Eh-About time you woke up!" I nearly stuttered. Me, the AMAZING Soldier Red, almost stuttered. I mentally shook myself. What was wrong with me?

"Good morning." He smiled, not phased. As though it was a common occurrence for him to wake up with strange Irkens smiling at him. Was it? Common for him? I suddenly felt angry.

"Nothing good about this morning. Get up. We need to go." I said, my voice harsh, too harsh. "I'll wait in the living room." I said, trying to lighten up. I left the bedroom.

It didn't take him long to join me, with that annoying smile on his face. We left together, silently. Our walk to the Tallest was strange to me. It was comfortable and nerve wracking all that the same time. For some reason, his presence calmed me. Maybe it was his insistence that we would win, and that he would support me. I wasn't sure.

We entered the Tallest chambers to find that we were the first team there. This pleased me, I didn't like to be late. We stood to the side and waited silently. The Tallest were on the platform above us, like usual. They were munching on muffins for breakfast, not bothering to speak. I watched them, discreetly. They moved around each other smoothly, one went to grab a muffin and the other reached around his arm as though that arm was attached to himself, as though he already knew where the others arm was and where it was going. The longer I watched them, the more fascinated I became.

When the Splorg and Kreet arrived, we all stood in front of their platform silently, waiting to be addressed.

"Hello again, Soldiers. We have decided what your final test should be." One of them said, stuffing another muffin in his mouth.

"Yes, it will be one of the hardest tests you have ever endured, some of you may not survive." The other said, his eye narrowing evilly.

"It will test you to your limits, it will be hard, but the reward is the position of the ALMIGHTY Tallest." The first said.

The four of us stood to attention, all of us quite nervous. I didn't spare a glance at Purple.

"You will complete..."One said, leaving his sentence hanging and smiling. We all held our breath, waiting.

"A scavenger hunt." He finished. I tried hard not to opening gape at them. None of us moved. Were they serious? A scavenger hunt?

"We will give each pair a list of items that have been hidden. The first team to find and bring all of the items back to us will become the next set of Tallest." My eyes widened. Purple was right. Whichever pair won would _both_ become Tallest. I fought the urge to glance at him.

"When we say 'go', both teams will go back to their rooms to retrieve their lists, which have been placed on the table in your living room. Understood, grease monkeys?" He asked. The four of us nodded. I tensed, getting ready.

"Go!"

I grabbed Purple by the hand and took off, dragging him behind me. I tried to focus on running, and not the feel of his gloved hand in mine. It took only a couple of minutes to reach our room. I let go of his hand and snatched the paper off of the table and read aloud;

"One rubber pig, one laser pointer, two orange sodas, and one large pizza." I looked up at Purple. "What is this crap? You can get all this at the toy store and the food court." I said, confused.

"Well don't you think we should go then?" Purple replied, smiling and holding out his hand. I looked at him, then hesitantly grabbed his hand as he pulled me out of the room.

We ran down the halls to the toys store, other Irkens jumped out of our way as we ran passed them. We rushed through the doors to the toy store and ran down the isles until we found what we were looking for. Purple grabbed the rubber pig and squeezed it happily.

"Pig!" He yelled at me, holding the toy in my face. I frowned, annoyed. He was an idiot. We ran off and searched until we found the laser. I held the laser pointer and Purple hugged the rubber pig to his chest with his free hand, the one not claimed by me. We stood in line, rather impatiently on my part, until we were at the counter. I shoved money into the lowly Irken's face and didn't bother waiting for my change and I took off running out of the store, dragging Purple behind me.

The halls seemed more crowded than usual as we ran down them towards the food court. Many Irkens were talking excitedly to each other. I decided they must know that a winner was about to be chosen, so the New Tallest ceremony would be happening soon. New Tallests weren't chosen until the old Tallests decided they were tired of being Tallest, so it didn't happen often. Everyone left their jobs to celebrate the New Tallest ceremony. It was just a giant party.

My insides were churning as we reached the food court. I groaned, the lines were miles long. We were rushing in the direction of the pizza counter when a conversation caught my attention.

"This LARGE PIZZA and TWO ORANGE SODAS will be so delicious, don't you think?" One small Irken asked his companion. I looked over at them in disbelief.

"OH YES, so delicious this LARGE PIZZA and TWO ORANGE SODAS will be!" The other little Irken responded. I stopped in my tracks, Purple slammed into me, his hands clutching to me to stop from falling, I grabbed him, our faces close together. Our breathing was heavy as we stared into each others faces, surprised at the sudden closeness. His face was flushed from running, or maybe from me, I wasn't sure. I _was_ pretty amazing after all.

I pulled my brain out of the clouds and tore my face from his, releasing him. We regained our balance and I led the way towards the table where the two little Irkens were sitting. They were just sitting there. They hadn't touched the sodas or pizza. I frowned. What the hell was going on?

"Oh hello. You look hungry. Would you like our LARGE PIZZA and TWO ORANGE SODAS?" The little Irken asked pleasantly. I gaped at him, squinting one eye. It must be some kind of trick.

"Of course we would! We're just famished! Thank you!" Purple replied, smiling at the little Irken. I just stood there, taking the rubber pig when Purple shoved it at my chest so he could carry the pizza and sodas. I stared, dumbfounded as he gripped them carefully and looked to me, expectant. Something was going on here. This was too easy.

"Well? Are you ready to win, Red?" He asked, smiling. Nothing going on at all, his expression said. I just nodded. I would figure it out later, after we won. We walked quickly, afraid running would spill the sodas. It took a little longer to reach the Tallests rooms since we had to be careful. When we reached the doors, two servants stood on either side, ready to open the doors for us. It was oddly convenient, since our hands were full. They opened and stood to the side, letting us walk through.

Both Tallests stood there, grinning.

"Well it looks like we have our winners. Congratulations Red and Purple, you will become the new Tallests, and the leaders of our mighty Irken race. Do you accept this new position?" One of them asked. I took a second to think. This last test was too easy. I hadn't seen the other team since it started. Something was going on, something... fishy. I was suspicious.

But I was not going to turn down the position of Tallest. It was what I had always wanted, its what I went through all these stupid test for.

"Yes, I accept." I said, bowing my head respectfully.

"I accept, as well." I head Purple say from beside me. I quietly noted that he had not accepted until I had. I gave my attention to the Tallest, resigned to think about it all later.

"Excellent!" One of the Tallest replied while the other turned around and flipped a switch on one of their computers. The large screen came on to show Splorg and Kreet, in a ship.

"Soldier Splorg, Soldier Kreet, abandon your mission to acquire the rare vlorch beast from planet Mulch. You have lost. Come back to Irk and collect your belongings." He said to the soldiers. Their faces fell, distressed by their defeat. "Yes my Tallest.", Kreet replied, before cutting off the transmission.

What the Irk what going on? We were sent after toys and food while Kreet and Splorg were send after a vlorch monster? No one was even sure if those actually existed! I looked up to see the Tallest eating the pizza and sipping on the sodas. One of them was squeezing the rubber pig and the other was pointing the laser at my eye. It twitched involuntarily.

"You have a busy evening ahead of you, Soldiers. Go rest and eat until we send someone to you with your schedule." One said, between chews. The both of them were smiling, happily munching on their pizza. We were obviously dismissed. We bowed and turned to leave, letting the door shut softly behind us.

"What just happened?" I asked as we walked back to our room.

"We won. By this time tomorrow, we will be the new Tallest. Are you not happy?" Purple asked, looking at me as we walked.

"Of course I am." I said, a little defensively. "I just... didn't expect it to be so easy. I feel like it was rigged." I said quietly. I could feel his eyes on me.

"Red, you were meant to be Tallest. And I was meant to be your companion. How do you not realize this? You will be an amazing Tallest, much better than they could have been. Do not let the road you took to get here trouble you, you have already reached the end of it. It is over with. Focus on the now, at where you've ended up. Be happy, you've gotten what you've always wanted." He said. I looked at him. He was smiling at me. Once again, I was confused. What was his deal? What he really stupid or a genius? I just didn't understand.

But he was right. There was no use in worrying about how it had happened, at least not right now. All I should be doing is focusing on the New Tallest ceremony and the party that would be held. Without thinking about it too hard so that I wouldn't chicken out, I reached over and grabbed Purple's gloved hand. He smiled at me. I took that as his okay, and continued holding his hand down the hall to our room.

I had an entire lifetime ahead of me to figure out why the contest had been rigged in our favor. But whoever had rigged it must have known that I should be Tallest, that I alone was superior and worthy of the honor. Well, and maybe Purple. We would be Tallest together. Forever. Or until we decided we were tired of it.

Just me and him. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. He was smiling to himself, walking, seemingly oblivious.

"What do you want to do until tonight?" I asked him.

"I dunno. Kill time I guess." He replied, smiling at me. I smiled back.

"Sounds good to me."


End file.
